So as a background on myself. I am a single mother of 4 little boys. My oldest is 12 and my youngest is 5. I work full time and then take care of my children as well. I live day to day on a budget! It is hard, I must tell you that budgeting is the hardest thing I have ever had to do in my life.
I love eating out in restaurants, I love going on vacations and staying in hotels. I love being pampered. All that came to a screeching halt when the money ran dry and I realized I was not able to afford that kind of lifestyle any longer. I still go through withdrawals.
However, I am slowly starting to see that living with in my means, (sometimes not always easy by the way or possible) and providing a comfortable lifestyle for my kids has satisfied my sense of purpose.
I have fought for years trying to find where I belong. What I should be doing. When I had to leave home to work I was so hurt and ridden with guilt that I actually took a job at the daycare where I placed the children so I could be close by them.
However, you can't really live on $6.00 per hour (4 years ago) and make ends meet very well. Eventually I set myself at peace (most days) and left to gain employment in a field I have always been fascinated with. I work at the State Prison. I work in support services 40 hours a week. I graduated from Provo College in 2009 with an associated degree in Criminal Justice and been looking every since. One day it will pay off.
All that being said it was time to get on a budget!
I have found that to live that satisfyingly simple life I had to set one day a week to stress about finances. The rest of the week I have a plan (budget) and I know what I can (more importantly can not) spend during the week. Then by the end of the next week I will stress over it again.
I figured out that a budget is something that is ever changing. A living thing that takes on new faces when your circumstances change. So you must be willing to bend a bit when the wind blows harder and straighten up a bit when the breezy weather comes.
So how to start a budget?
#1-I found that the first step for me was writing down everything I spent for one full day!
Now you may say what is one day going to do for me. Look at step 2.
#2- Do the same thing you did yesterday today!
Do these two steps for 1 full week. Then 1 full month. Then you may look at your habits and start changing them very slowly.
I can hear you right now. WAIT I need help now not a month from now. My bills are stacking up and I need to pay them. I need to fix this NOW not in a month this will never work!
You know I said the same thing. But you see, we must start slowly so we do not get overwhelmed and discouraged because then we are more likely to give up and quite. We did not get in the place we are right now overnight. Most did not get in trouble over a period of a month. It took years and years of bad habits to get where we are right now.
Krik (my very patient significant other) told me to do these first two steps and guess what I hated doing it. I rejected the idea we could be financially stable if I waited that long. I listened to that small voice of doubt and said "this is a waste of time and will never work"
But you know what once I started it did. I found out where my money was going. I found that I was eating out way more then I could really afford. I was driving way more then I could afford. I was spending $ I did not have at the time. My bills were not priority in my life. Spending was!
I hated writing down I spent $5.00 - $6.00 a day on lunch because I was to lazy to make it the night before or to forgetful to grab it.
I hated having to write down all the drinks I bought everyday. All the extra spending I would spend taking side trips with the kids on the weekends. I hated writing down the bills each month and how much they added up to. I hated it when at the end of the 4 weeks time I could see that if I changed 1 or 2 habits I could make my money work for me instead of against me. I hated it because he was right!
Still I did this and guess what I failed. I am really glad I can be that honest with you about my failures, because it may show all of you struggling to keep up on finances it is not easy. It is a living breathing effort taking task that must be maintained on a weekly basis and then put away for the next week.
Now you have done 1 months worth of evaluation you are ready to step up to the next habit of your budget.
you may use the envelope system, spreadsheets, basic lined paper how ever you do it and want to use it you must be committed to following it.
$504.00 *2 (because I get paid every other Friday) = $1008.00
Child support of $240*3 is usually what I see = $720
Total income = $ 1728.00
Rent/Mortgage because you have to have a place to live. $695.00
Transportation (I am lucky because I paid mine off)
Gas to get back and forth to work- $60.00 *4 = $240.00
Utilities = Electricity ($70.00)-Natural Gas ($100)- Sewer- Trash-Water($70.00) = $240.00
Food= This for me Varies so I take the most I might spend in one month = $125.00
This is so low because I have a food storage and a garden. I also take advantage of case lot sales, Food Co-ops and other means of savings. I will write a post about strictly this in the coming weeks.
Orthodontist: $48.00
Phone bill: $ 250.00 (because I bundle my Internet and 3 phones this is higher than most)
Medical Payments: 0.00 paid off
Attorney fees $50.00
Student loans: $ 43.50*2 = 87.00
Loan from family member: $ 20.00
Credit Cards $ 0.00 paid off and cut up!!! (good rule of thumb to get to a satisfyingly simple life: NO DEBT! no credit cards pay with cash only! this frees you from the stress of interest rates and owing someone.
Total = $ 455.00
To pay down credit cards start with the smallest balance 1st. Pay minimum amounts on each of the other cards and anything extra at the end of the month goes right on that card. Until it paid off.
You and your family may have to live on bread and instant mashed potatoes for 6 months but in the end you will find it is worth not owing anyone.
To stay out of this mess or revolving wind cycle: pay everything with cash. Cut up your credit cards so you are not tempted to use them. Then when you have one credit card paid off put what you were paying towards that card right into the payment for the next one.
{if you are like me in need examples: Lets say I have a walmart card credit limit of $75.00 I thought how can I get in trouble with that? Well I missed a payment it was not a priority. So it turned into a $225.00 bill now. Minimum payment of $25.00 per month. I had a credit card with my bank that I owed $500.00 on as well. Minimum payment per month on that was $75.00. I took each credit card out of my purse and cut them in half. OUCH to my self esteem. I was so proud of those cards. But if I had them I was using them, that needed to stop. Then I paid the minimum payment on my bank card and put all extra towards 125 payment. Some months this was an extra $5.00 some months it was an extra $25.00. each month I paid I could see a small dent in the bill cycle. Once it was paid off I took that $25.00 and put it on top of the $75.00 so i was actually paying $100.00 on my bank card each month plus any extra at the end of the month. Again some months it was $5.00 and other is was $30.00 it did not matter I was paying extra. Guess what, with in 4 months both cards were paid off and I was out of debt. I closed the account's and never looked back.}
As you can see it is hard work to stay on top of the budget but once committed to it you will find it is okay if you fail because you are trying. It may not be perfect. It may not be like mine. I have a very small and tight budget. This is because I do not have the availability of money right now.
Again I will STRESS please please set a day and time aside to stress about finances. Once they are taken care for the week, forget about them. You have what you can spend for the week and you know where your money has to go. Then you can feel free to relax with your children , spouse , or friends for the rest of the week. Living simple is really this SIMPLE. Remember the KISS rule. Keep it Simple Stupid. That is why I only do fiances once a week at a set time. I found if I did not do this, I would constantly worry about money and never relax with my children or significant others.
If you mess up and worry it is okay we are all human and it takes time to really get this part of budgeting down.
Write comments with your suggestions, thoughts, and discussions. I want to hear what is working for you and what isn't.
I will re post in 1 month to find out how you are all doing.
I love eating out in restaurants, I love going on vacations and staying in hotels. I love being pampered. All that came to a screeching halt when the money ran dry and I realized I was not able to afford that kind of lifestyle any longer. I still go through withdrawals.
However, I am slowly starting to see that living with in my means, (sometimes not always easy by the way or possible) and providing a comfortable lifestyle for my kids has satisfied my sense of purpose.
I have fought for years trying to find where I belong. What I should be doing. When I had to leave home to work I was so hurt and ridden with guilt that I actually took a job at the daycare where I placed the children so I could be close by them.
However, you can't really live on $6.00 per hour (4 years ago) and make ends meet very well. Eventually I set myself at peace (most days) and left to gain employment in a field I have always been fascinated with. I work at the State Prison. I work in support services 40 hours a week. I graduated from Provo College in 2009 with an associated degree in Criminal Justice and been looking every since. One day it will pay off.
All that being said it was time to get on a budget!
I have found that to live that satisfyingly simple life I had to set one day a week to stress about finances. The rest of the week I have a plan (budget) and I know what I can (more importantly can not) spend during the week. Then by the end of the next week I will stress over it again.
I figured out that a budget is something that is ever changing. A living thing that takes on new faces when your circumstances change. So you must be willing to bend a bit when the wind blows harder and straighten up a bit when the breezy weather comes.
So how to start a budget?
#1-I found that the first step for me was writing down everything I spent for one full day!
Now you may say what is one day going to do for me. Look at step 2.
#2- Do the same thing you did yesterday today!
Do these two steps for 1 full week. Then 1 full month. Then you may look at your habits and start changing them very slowly.
I can hear you right now. WAIT I need help now not a month from now. My bills are stacking up and I need to pay them. I need to fix this NOW not in a month this will never work!
You know I said the same thing. But you see, we must start slowly so we do not get overwhelmed and discouraged because then we are more likely to give up and quite. We did not get in the place we are right now overnight. Most did not get in trouble over a period of a month. It took years and years of bad habits to get where we are right now.
Krik (my very patient significant other) told me to do these first two steps and guess what I hated doing it. I rejected the idea we could be financially stable if I waited that long. I listened to that small voice of doubt and said "this is a waste of time and will never work"
But you know what once I started it did. I found out where my money was going. I found that I was eating out way more then I could really afford. I was driving way more then I could afford. I was spending $ I did not have at the time. My bills were not priority in my life. Spending was!
I hated writing down I spent $5.00 - $6.00 a day on lunch because I was to lazy to make it the night before or to forgetful to grab it.
I hated having to write down all the drinks I bought everyday. All the extra spending I would spend taking side trips with the kids on the weekends. I hated writing down the bills each month and how much they added up to. I hated it when at the end of the 4 weeks time I could see that if I changed 1 or 2 habits I could make my money work for me instead of against me. I hated it because he was right!
Still I did this and guess what I failed. I am really glad I can be that honest with you about my failures, because it may show all of you struggling to keep up on finances it is not easy. It is a living breathing effort taking task that must be maintained on a weekly basis and then put away for the next week.
Now you have done 1 months worth of evaluation you are ready to step up to the next habit of your budget.
you may use the envelope system, spreadsheets, basic lined paper how ever you do it and want to use it you must be committed to following it.
- Take your income and put it at the top of the page.
$504.00 *2 (because I get paid every other Friday) = $1008.00
Child support of $240*3 is usually what I see = $720
Total income = $ 1728.00
- Then take your basic needs bills and those are your first to be paid.
Rent/Mortgage because you have to have a place to live. $695.00
Transportation (I am lucky because I paid mine off)
Gas to get back and forth to work- $60.00 *4 = $240.00
Utilities = Electricity ($70.00)-Natural Gas ($100)- Sewer- Trash-Water($70.00) = $240.00
Food= This for me Varies so I take the most I might spend in one month = $125.00
This is so low because I have a food storage and a garden. I also take advantage of case lot sales, Food Co-ops and other means of savings. I will write a post about strictly this in the coming weeks.
- Now add up your basic bills = $1300.00 give or take & subtract basic bills from income = $ 428.00 left at the end of each month.
- Now add up all your outstanding bills
Orthodontist: $48.00
Phone bill: $ 250.00 (because I bundle my Internet and 3 phones this is higher than most)
Medical Payments: 0.00 paid off
Attorney fees $50.00
Student loans: $ 43.50*2 = 87.00
Loan from family member: $ 20.00
Credit Cards $ 0.00 paid off and cut up!!! (good rule of thumb to get to a satisfyingly simple life: NO DEBT! no credit cards pay with cash only! this frees you from the stress of interest rates and owing someone.
Total = $ 455.00
- Now take the total left over after all your needs are paid $428.00 and subtract your wants bills $455.00 = $-27.00.
To pay down credit cards start with the smallest balance 1st. Pay minimum amounts on each of the other cards and anything extra at the end of the month goes right on that card. Until it paid off.
You and your family may have to live on bread and instant mashed potatoes for 6 months but in the end you will find it is worth not owing anyone.
To stay out of this mess or revolving wind cycle: pay everything with cash. Cut up your credit cards so you are not tempted to use them. Then when you have one credit card paid off put what you were paying towards that card right into the payment for the next one.
{if you are like me in need examples: Lets say I have a walmart card credit limit of $75.00 I thought how can I get in trouble with that? Well I missed a payment it was not a priority. So it turned into a $225.00 bill now. Minimum payment of $25.00 per month. I had a credit card with my bank that I owed $500.00 on as well. Minimum payment per month on that was $75.00. I took each credit card out of my purse and cut them in half. OUCH to my self esteem. I was so proud of those cards. But if I had them I was using them, that needed to stop. Then I paid the minimum payment on my bank card and put all extra towards 125 payment. Some months this was an extra $5.00 some months it was an extra $25.00. each month I paid I could see a small dent in the bill cycle. Once it was paid off I took that $25.00 and put it on top of the $75.00 so i was actually paying $100.00 on my bank card each month plus any extra at the end of the month. Again some months it was $5.00 and other is was $30.00 it did not matter I was paying extra. Guess what, with in 4 months both cards were paid off and I was out of debt. I closed the account's and never looked back.}
As you can see it is hard work to stay on top of the budget but once committed to it you will find it is okay if you fail because you are trying. It may not be perfect. It may not be like mine. I have a very small and tight budget. This is because I do not have the availability of money right now.
Again I will STRESS please please set a day and time aside to stress about finances. Once they are taken care for the week, forget about them. You have what you can spend for the week and you know where your money has to go. Then you can feel free to relax with your children , spouse , or friends for the rest of the week. Living simple is really this SIMPLE. Remember the KISS rule. Keep it Simple Stupid. That is why I only do fiances once a week at a set time. I found if I did not do this, I would constantly worry about money and never relax with my children or significant others.
If you mess up and worry it is okay we are all human and it takes time to really get this part of budgeting down.
Write comments with your suggestions, thoughts, and discussions. I want to hear what is working for you and what isn't.
I will re post in 1 month to find out how you are all doing.
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